One of the teachers of the law…asked [Jesus], “Of all the commandments, which is the most important?” Jesus answered, “The most important one is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” Mark 12:28-31
There’s a popular saying that if we are to love others as we love ourselves, we have to love ourselves. That statement has been used to justify all sorts of self-indulgence, which was never the point of Jesus words in today’s verse. But it also reflects a truth that becomes more obvious when talking about showing love through acts of Kindness.
People who are at peace with themselves are able to give peace away. People who are kind to themselves are people with a reservoir of kindness to work from in their kind words and actions. People with a healthy identity spread emotional health among those they come in contact with.
So the first question in establishing a healthy identity is ‘Am I loved?’ And we have to find a yes to that. ‘Am I loved by God?’ is the central question of life, and similarly, ‘Will I allow myself to receive God’s love?’ We know we are loved by God—at least we know it in our heads. But do our hearts respond to His love?
‘Am I loved by others?’ is the send question brought out by today’s verses, but it’s like the first. Being loved by others (allowing others’ permission to love us) is important, in part, because it can help us establish a more secure idea of God’s love. Establishing in our innermost being that God loves me individually is critical to my identity and overcoming any spirit of rejection I face.
You see, if we read in the Bible that God loves us, but other people who read the Bible treat us like trash, sooner or later their lack of love is going to taint God’s “brand”. This is not to say that all Christians should be beating down our door to show God’s kindness; but yes, a few should—that’s healthy Kingdom living. God doesn’t send armies when a few will do the job better.
Point is, we need to be open to that kindness. Because if we aren’t—if we’re too proud, or too busy, afraid we’ll ‘owe’ the person displaying kindness, whatever, we’re closing the door of our lives on God’s love for us. He demonstrates His love directly, but also through others who love Him.
So the first two questions in our identity of kindness are tied together just as they are in the Gospels. ‘Does God love me?’ ‘Does anyone else love me?’ Get the affirmation of those questions down on our hearts and we won’t have any trouble ‘remembering’ to be kind. It will become part of who we are. Part of our identity.