Encourage each other and build each other up. 1 Thessalonians 5:11

We live in a very pretty negative culture—in a society where put downs are the number one form of humor. People are marginalized, ostracized, and criticized in an attitude of elitism, where exclusiveness and snobbery seem like the only way to not get swept down the disapproval drain. And it happens in the world, it happens in our churches, it happens in our homes.

God calls us to do the exact opposite. He says, as believers, we are to value everybody. When we look around at people—even people who are insulting us and putting us down, denigrating values we hold dear—we must keep focused on the truth that Jesus died for them. They matter greatly to God.

And while this is true of our attitudes toward the obviously disenfranchised, the needy…those on the outside, it’s also true of those we interact with on a daily basis. We all need affirmation and encouragement.

Call it appreciation, affirmation, when we encourage others and build them up, we raise their value. We treat them as if they matter. We say nice things about them—both in their hearing and out of their hearing. So how can you and I affirm people?

•       By noticing them.
•       By listening to them.
•       By applauding their contributions.
•       (And here’s a big one for churches) By being interested in more than just their value as a worker /contributor, but also their life and interests beyond church.
•       By including them in events rather than ignoring them.

Here are some ways to encourage and build up the people around us:

1) Listen to them. “Share each other’s troubles and problems, and in this way obey the law of Christ” (Gal 6:2). One of the greatest gifts we can give people is an attentive ear. That’s often hard to do because we have other things to attend to…time constraints are real…which is why listening is so valuable. It says “You matter. I value what you have to say. I value who you are. I think your opinion is important (even if we don’t agree).” Every time we genuinely listen to people, we’re ministering to them. By listening, we show we care. Paul is telling us that by doing this we obey the law of Christ (the two great commandments… Loving God and loving our neighbor as ourselves).

2) Use positive words. “Speak only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs (not our needs, but theirs) that it may benefit those who listen” (Eph 4:29). Another translation says, “let your words become beautiful gifts that encourage others; do this by speaking words of grace to help them”. God wants us, as believers, to be people builders not people users. Most of the world is filled with people users. God says that when we speak positive words of encouragement to people and we build them up, we’re ministering to people.

Sometimes the people around us really need to change. Sometimes they want to change but need our help to point the way. Other times they don’t want to change, but that doesn’t make it OK for us to drop them. Treating them the way we want them to become as if they have already become it can help. That’s speaking in faith. People tend to live up to our expectations of them.

More on this next time.